I’m going to share with you a simple trick for getting a mentor and learning what you really want to know.

You’ll see how I walked away with not only a mentor, but also $2,000 in just a couple of hours.

I have to warn you though: You’re not going to want to do it. But if you do it–correctly–you’ll get more than you ever thought possible. It won’t be hard–it will be challenging though.

In all fairness, it’s not a trick. It’s more about admitting to something that’s true. And it’s a very simple tactic that will get you more.

This post started off being the 7 Things I’ve Learned From Urban Farming. As I wrote it though, I realized there was one really big lesson I wanted to share. It’s about allowing yourself to be taught and winning over a great mentor.

No one likes to look stupid. People–us guys especially–often want to really look like we know what we’re doing. We want to be seen as smart, knowing, and capable.

But admitting to ignorance or even playing it up a bit can get you further than not. And when it comes to mentors, they want to see smart, capable, with a little bit of not knowing.

Here’s an example…

Breeding rabbits for my urban farm has been problematic. They haven’t bred to the levels I thought they would and I’ve made mistakes along the way. Some have been big mistakes and others small. All of them were just as annoying regardless of size.

While you can glean a lot of information from books, a good mentor will point out the subtleties a book can not. They also point out the mistakes you make that are so far outside the realm of ‘WTF’ that the book didn’t cover.

After speaking with the owner of the local pet supply store I got the name of a good breeder. Turns out, she’s actually a fairly famous breeder in rabbit circles. When I called her I laid it all out. I emphasized all the mistakes and difficulties I was encountering.

Three important things: I never complained about how hard it was AND I expressed a sincere passion for what I was doing. I also illustrated my willingness to work my ASS OFF through examples not lip service.

Mentors don’t want someone that will complain incessantly, they want to know you’re passionate about the topic, and they want to know you’ll put in the work it takes. They’ve probably heard a million times how bad someone wants something only to later hear, “This is too much work.”

By the time our first phone call was over the breeder was inviting me out to her farm for lessons. Once we got started I asked her to pretend I knew absolutely nothing. And I joked that it wasn’t far from the truth.

A little self-deprecating humor is better than saying, “I’m a complete idiot.”

In those first few hours I spent with her I learned more than all of the books I’d read combined. In part this was because I played dumb. If she started telling me about something I thought I already knew I didn’t stop her or interject anything other than questions.

This did mean I spent time listening to things I already knew in some cases. BUT it also meant that I got the little bits that make a big difference I didn’t know about. It’s often those little hidden bits that make a good mentor worth having.

Have the patience to learn.

I mentioned asking questions. I asked a TON of questions. Specifically I asked a lot of questions about caring for the animals–especially when it came to their well being. I asked questions like, “This may seem overly touchy feely, but how do I ensure their happiness? After all, I’ll end up ‘Harvesting’ them and I want to do my best to thank them for it.”

She enthusiastically answered and became even more driven to share with me. Nothing was held back and she went on instructing me for hours even though it was getting late.

Important note: These questions weren’t insincere.

We continued on and she got out two of her prized does. She went into great detail from what to look for in a doe to how to actually tell that they are ‘in the mood’. She also solved the problem of why some of my does had become aggressive. The amount of knowledge I learned and pitfalls she has helped me avoid were priceless.

Everyone that you look to as a mentor got there because they were passionate about the topic. They had to have really cared about what they were doing and EVERYTHING involved.

You have to show the same level–or close enough that they can sell you on the next level–of interest, passion, and dedication to craftsmanship.

Finally, as the hour became really late that first night, I expressed my appreciation for her time and knowledge. I then expressed a desire to purchase a couple of her rabbits for my own breeding stock and began to take out money. She looked at me incredulously and told me to put it away. She explained that the two does–worth about $2,000–she had been instructing me with were now mine. Both were champions multiple times over. AND she had bred them to her prize winning buck worth more than the two does combined while teaching me.

So, identify and be passionate about what they are, be ready to prove you’re actually open to doing the hard work, and play dumb–even if you’re not. You can be taught (something all mentors really want to do) if you are honest about being ignorant. You can’t be taught if you think you already know everything.